Identity Crisis

This one time on my mission...

I'd been out for 9 months when I was put in a three-some which included a brand new sister. Sister Knecht was gregarious, bold and always did what we asked her with zealous optimism. She was blond, tall, funny and reminded me of a basketball playing version of Barbie. Sister Higgins was the senior of the group; a kind, soft-spoken and gentle leader.

In our first few days together, we were out knocking doors and took turns on approaches. We would each announce our names and then the designated sister would begin teaching. We had been working smoothly until it came to Sister Knecht’s turn to teach. I started “Hi, I’m Sister Medley,” then basketball Barbie blurted “Hi, I’m Sister Higgins.” I turned quickly to see what the real Sister Higgins was going to say since her name had been stolen! The lovely Sister Higgins, struggling to hold back her laughter, rolled with it and said “Hi, I’m Sister Knecht!” The greenie hadn’t realized what she’d done until she heard Sister Higgins introduce herself using her name. Sister Knecht struggled and stumbled through her teaching and we lost all composure as we ventured down the rest of the street. 

The basketball Barbie who couldn’t remember her own name.

Sister Hone

Texas San Antonio Mission

2006-2008 

Bean Plants

This one time one my mission...

In my last area, there was a recent convert named Jesse. God bless him, he was the quintessential Southern Hick; bald, front tooth missing, wore a wife beater with his gut hanging out, and spoke with a drawl as thick as molasses. Also, his favorite pastime was watching a mechanical dancing Santa, which he kept on the mantle and often danced alongside. You couldn't help but love him. My companion's last name was Horrocks, but he refused to call her that because, according to him, "It ain't right to go callin' no nice lady 'whore', even if it IS in her name." So, in his earnest attempt at chivalry, he addressed her as "Sister Hawkins".
Anyway, Jesse had dropped out of school in 3rd grade, so his reading skills were lacking. But he still tried to read the Book of Mormon. We stopped by to check on him one day. "How's your scripture study going?" I asked. He nodded his head vigorously and declared with pride, "Oh yeah! I been readin' some! I been readin' about them bean plants."
I blinked in confusion. "Bean plants?" I echoed. "Yeah, Sister! Don't ya 'member!?!" He rolled his eyes at me, as if in shock that I could possibly forget a passage as pivotal as the one about the bean plants. "Well, shoot!" he continued, "That Nephi had to kill a man to get'em...so I figure they's important. Ain't they?"
It all suddenly became clear and I had to suppress a laugh. "I think you mean BRASS PLATES, Jesse. That's what they had to go back and get." I was instantly afraid I had embarrassed him, but he just shrugged his shoulders. "Aw, brass plates....bean plants. No matter. Wanna watch me dance with Santa?"

Sister Smoot

Texas San Antonio

2006-2008

Campbell Soup

This one time on my mission...

I was serving in my first area. My companion and I were both new to the area and since we had no one to teach, we spent our first day tracting. It was hot, humid and the mid-day sun beat down on us without relent. After hours of tracting, and no success, I began thinking to myself, “Boy, I sure am looking forward to two years of this...” 

We knocked on the door of a man who finally let us in. With tears, he related his woes to my companion and I. His wife had recently left him, his kids were having a really hard time, and recently, he had teeth removed by the dentist. I was thrilled! Not with his predicament, of course, but that someone was willing to listen to our message. I had envisioned this day, when I would be able to preach the gospel to my fellowmen and here it was. The first door I had ever gotten into, my first lesson - I was finally a missionary. What an amazing moment!

As we sat in his front room, we reintroduced ourselves. The man followed suit, “My name is Bill Campbell, ya know, like in the soup.”  Now you may recall, the man had just returned home from the dentist where he’d had some teeth pulled, so his words were not very clear. I heard “My name is Bill Campbell, just call me Soup.”  

With that, I began the lesson, “It's gonna be okay Soup.” He looked at me strangely, but I continued, “Soup, things will get better.”

Afterward, amidst great bursts of laughter, my companion explained to me my mishap. For some odd reason, old Soup never invited us back again.

Elder Mark Durant

Louisville, Kentucky

A Cry Went Forth

I had a terrible stomach ache. This was not an uncommon tale serving in the Philippines. This time was different, however, because I had not passed anything for 72 hours. I was determined on this particular day to overcome my ailing digestive system. After about an hour in the bathroom, something finally passed. I stood up to find a four-inch worm in the toilet. I screamed like a little girl, calling for my companion. He remains my witness to this day.

This was admittedly the scariest day of my mission and perhaps my life. Luckily, medical professionals assured me it was a common and harmless circumstance. After taking medication that helped remove any remaining critters, I carried a memorabilia card that read Ether 14:18 “And there went a fear of Shiz throughout the land; yea, a cry went forth throughout the land - Who can stand before the army of Shiz?”

Elder Hansen
Philippines Quezon City Mission
2007-2009

"Excuse Me Ladies..."

This One time on my mission...

We were driving down the road in the ghetto of South Central, LA. I had two companions at the time as opposed to only one and I was in the back seat of the car.

While heading home we passed two interesting looking "street walkers". Long Hair, thick, bright makeup, and high heels. They were wearing matching BRIGHT pink tube tops and matching flamboyant miniskirts. So stumbling upon this rare find, I told my companion that this would be the perfect opportunity to share the gospel.

We pulled up to the ladies, my companion rolled down his window, and he said "Excuse me ladies..."

The ladies turned, and in a deep voice said, "Thanks for the compliment, but we're not ladies."

They were guys!  We didn't see that coming!  Needless to say, we didn't book a follow up appointment. 

Elder Del Denney

Los Angeles CA Mission 2003-2005

Energy of Soul

This one time on my mission...

In Mozambique, heated water is a commodity, especially for a shower, so cold showers were common for nearly my entire mission. In one apartment, we decided we would raise the stakes and get an electronically heated shower head that uses an electrical coil to heat the water as it passed through the shower head. Although this may sound like a safety hazard, this device was a mass-produced product, sold in stores. Having hot water for a morning shower was quite the luxury, however, when the water pressure was high enough, a solid enough stream of water would connect my body to the non-grounded electrical shower head, precariously plugged in to a 220 volt outlet on the other side of the bathroom. A jolt of that kind of current passing through your body at 6:30 in the morning will make you reconsider the “luxury” of heated water. After a few days, the risk proved to be too great and we opted for cold, non-electrified water.

Elder Medley
Mozambique Maputo
2002-2004

Skunked

This one time on my mission...

We were sharing an apartment with another companionship in northern San Antonio, located in the wealthy neighborhoods surrounding the temple. The area was predominately gated neighborhoods with long winding roads weaving around the riches and mansions, skirted with groves of thick, brushy oak trees - ideal habitat for all kinds of critters.
We were driving home after dark and approaching a gradual dip on the dimly lit road. At the bottom of the dip was a small gully with a drain on either side to allow for water to flow off the road. As we came upon the drain, a skunk came waddling out of the drain directly in front of our vehicle. I had time to slam on the brakes and stop just before the black and white ball of stink would have gone under the car and out of view. It waddled a little more, whipped around and threw its tail up in imminent threat. In wild fury, I gunned it and ran that varmint over in glorious defeat. In my defense, I thought running it over before it sprayed us would keep the stench to a minimum...I was horrifically erred in my thinking. My companion put both hands to her face and screamed in distress as we clumped over the animal and sped down the road. She was gagging and gasping for air out the window while I laughed in hysterics at our new predicament. We headed straight for the car wash. It was to no avail, for when we returned to our apartment the other sisters were covering their noses in disgust before we even opened the door.
For weeks, our investigators knew we there before we rung the doorbell, and you can imagine the added snub we received trying to contact in the upstanding neighborhoods. But best of all, I had a new nickname; "the skunk killer."

Sister Medley
Texas San Antonio Mission
2006-2008

Thief in the Night

This one time on my mission...

When I was serving in my last area, my companion and I shared an apartment with another set of Elders. We were arriving home from an all-day Zone Conference, and arrived before the other companionship. It was just a few minutes before the 9pm curfew and the other Elders hadn’t arrived yet. During that few minutes, my companion and I staged a break-in. We turned over both of the large study tables, threw a bunch of papers about, and lightly trashed the apartment. My companion (a Division-1 football player) decided to get dressed in all black and wait for them to arrive.

We left the front door slightly open...

The two unsuspecting Elders arrived home and opened the front door. "Elder...oh no. We've been robbed!"

They both walked slowly into the apartment, and the senior companion walked toward the bedroom where we were waiting. Just as he came to the bedroom door, my companion, all six feet and 250 lbs of him, jumped out and grabbed him in a big bear hug.

The other elder shrieked and ran full speed out of the front door, leaving his companion in the arms of a supposed criminal. 

After a few moments of glory, my companion and I finally burst into laughter. Luckily, were able to locate the junior companion in the parking lot. Needless to say, his senior companion would never trust him again.

Anonomous

Pennsylvania Harrisburg Mission
2005-2007

Hitching a Ride

This one time on my mission...

Elder Hansen and I were valiantly tracting a line of houses that faced the beautiful Chemung river. It was the dead of winter in upstate New York and a fresh six inches of snow was on the ground. The streets were chalky white and the sun bounced off the untrampled snow. 

After finishing the half-mile stroll, we were faced with the chore of walking back, only with no doors to knock this time since the houses only lined one side of the street. I was feeling the effects of trudging through all that snow and we were approaching lunch time so I turned to my companion and simply stated "I'll see you back at the apartment,” and handed him my scriptures, “Hold these.” He shot me a questioning look but I gave him the reassurance that all would be well. With that, I snuck behind a parked car and waited for the next vehicle driving up the street. There it was...Ready, get set...GO! I reached out and grabbed the corner of the bumper. My intentions were to ‘biz, hooky-bob’ a ride up the street. The jolt of grabbing a moving bumper from a crouched position nearly dislocated my shoulder but I was determined. My body immediately hit the ground, but I didn’t let go. As I was being dragged behind the moving car on my back, I flipped over (a move that would have made Chuck Norris proud), managed to get my feet under me and off we went! I held on to that bumper the whole way back up the street - a fully clothed missionary in a large overcoat, trailing gracefully behind a stranger’s vehicle. 

To this day, I doubt that driver even knew. What would have been a long walk back was finished in fine fashion in no time at all. 

As the car made its final turn, I let go of the bumper, skidded to a stop, and stood upright with pride. I dusted the snow off my shoes, brushed the dirt and snow from my coat and the fun was done. Elder Hansen came running for fear of leaving us separated for too long. I chuckled, "What took you so long Elder? I've been waiting forever!"

Elder Wilkes
New York Rochester Mission
1981-1982

The Basement

This one time on my mission...My companion and I lived in the back half of this really old house in a small town. As far as mission apartments go this thing was pretty sweet...except the basement. This thing was so sketchy it was scary. My companion once asked me if a tornado was coming, what would I do. I told him I'd just hang out in our room and hope for the best because I wasn't going to risk being trapped in that basement! There were creaky, old, not so trustworthy stairs leading down to a very dimly lit concrete room...well half a room. The other half was unfinished (unfinished as in all dirt). There was another small room to the left once you walked down the stairs that also was all dirt (pretty sure it was satans summer home). There was also another big problem with this basement...it's where the washer and dryer were. Every p-day I had to psych myself up to go down there. One p-day I decided to throw my laundry in the washer before I put my contacts in. I am pretty blind so I think it was either dumb or very brave of me to go down there with no sight. As I opened the door and started walking down the stairs a small black demon started flying up the stairs at my head! I ducked and it barely missed me. Before I knew it it was flying back up the stairs at me, this time really close to the stairs, as it got close I reared my leg and kicked! Solid contact! I sent the demon flying down the stairs. I ran back to our room and told my companion what had happened and he took off to run down the stairs to see what it was. I grabbed my glasses and headed to the stairs just in time to see my companion emerge through the door holding the demon, or Bird, as some would call it. Yes I may have overreacted, and No it wasn't a demon. But it was definitely possessed. I did the world a favor.

The Trinity

This one time on my mission....at one of the final zone conferences, I was having a wonderful time seeing some of my best friends that I had made on the mission, Elder Connolly and Elder Owens. I had trained Elder Owens and had not seen him or Elder Connolly in quite some time. We gave each other hugs and joked about a little club we had created between the three of us called "The Trinity." No one else knew of this club. We kept it quiet for obvious reasons. Anyway, my companion and I gave a really powerful training at this zone conference and the spirit was very strong. Immediately after the training we started a testimony meeting. I was sitting by my buddies Elder Owens and Elder Connolly and decided to set the example by getting up and sharing my testimony.
I could tell Elder Connolly was inspired because he got up right after me and went to the pulpit. The room went silent. "I can tell that I'm growing so much from having so many spiritual experiences." He said calmly, "In fact, if I keep going at this rate I'm going to be the next Prophet." The room exploded with laughter. Elder Connolly went on to give a wonderful testimony, which left Elder Owens as the only remaining member of "The Trinity" who hadn't yet born his testimony. Elder Connolly and I encouraged Elder Owens, but to no avail. He strongly refused our offer, as he had never actually gone up in a zone conference before to share his testimony. The more we persisted, the more resistant he became. The end of the meeting was drawing near and drastic action became necessary. Elder Connolly leaned over and whispered something to Elder Owens. With enthusiasm, He promptly got up and rushed to the pulpit. This was an epic moment - his first time ever sharing his testimony at a zone conference. "Umm, ahh, well...I do not want to be up here," he stammered, "but Shields and Connolly said that if I didn't come up that I would get kicked out of the Trinity." The room erupted once again in roaring laughter. I have never attended a testimony meeting as funny as that one. One of us the next Prophet and the other afraid to lose his spot in the Trinity.

Elder Shields
Florida Tampa Mission
1999-2001

Appearance of Obedience

This one time on my mission..My companion and I locked ourselves out of our apartment. Luckily we were in the giant metropolis of Gillette, Wyoming. All joking aside at least there was another set of missionaries in the city (not typical of the mission). However, we discovered we were locked out close to curfew, and had to walk a few miles to the other missionaries' apartment. Arriving late, knowing the apartment's policy to get a spare key was to visit the office during business hours; we crashed with our brethren that night. Due to the circumstances and late night the next morning we over slept, waking up just before a surprise visit from the 1st councilor to the Mission President, who worked for CES and was always on the road. Since my companion and I had slept in our clothes, we appeared to be up and productive; while the residents of the apartment were still half ready for the day.  1st Councilor hears our story and offers to drive us to get our spare key, after laying down a solid rebuking upon the other two missionaries. 1st Councilor treated us to breakfast before taking us to get the key. He spent the time together regaling us on our example and begging us not to judge the other Elder's.  Teaching us a valuable lesson: Obedience is good, but the appearance of obedience is always better. 

Elder Hoyle
South Dakota Rapid City
1998-2000

Walking on Thin Ice

I was a brand new missionary serving in my first area with my first companion. It was -62 degrees with wind and snow. In our small town, preparation days were pretty slow and it was hard to find things to do. So, one p-day, my companion decided he’d like to go for a little hike in a forest (we called it a forest but really was just a park that had like 100 trees). I wasn't thrilled about our hike, since we spent all day everyday out in the negative degree frozen tundra anyway. Hopping onto low hanging branches and snapping photos was a regular occurrence on these types of adventures. We hiked until we came to small river that was about 50 feet wide. The river was about 4 feet deep at its deepest, so it was clearly frozen over. My companion was determined to press on, but that would involve crossing the frozen river. I told him that I had seen this in a movie and that the outcome was almost never positive. Before I finished my sentence, he was already walking carefully across the river. Sure enough, we started hearing creaks and groans under his feet. Just like the movie, he turned and looked at me with a horrified look on his face right as he broke through the ice. Since the river was shallow and barely moving, he simply dropped about his armpits and stood there. He struggled to climb to the muddy bank. He then yelled over to me to go get the car and bring it to him, since there was a road that passed nearby on his side of the river. I reminded him that he had the keys. He checked his pockets and I could see by the look on his face he didn't have them. I suggested that maybe he had dropped them on one of his vanity photo shoots. I went back through the trees a little way off and said a little prayer something like "Heavenly Father, I know this wasn’t the brightest idea, but he's pretty cold, so please help me find the keys" as soon as I finished, a single leaf fluttered across the snow uncovering the a hole in the snow made by the dropping keys. I scooped them up, said a prayer of thanks and went and got my companion to get him warm. As we drove home, he said "Elder Webster, never tell anyone about this!!". You got it buddy;)

Elder Webster
Iowa Des Moines Mission

Save Yourselves!

This one time on my mission….we had special permission to head to the beach on preparation day. All of the missionaries in our zone were excited to do something different for a change and we were looking forward to it all week. We were lucky enough to have beautiful beaches and massive waves in the area as well.  As our zone hung out on the beach watching the waves crash and playing soccer we noticed a large rock sitting out of the water about 10 feet away from shore.  The rock would normally be impossible to reach without swimming but with the tide receded out far enough, we could run and reach the rock safely if we moved quickly between each wave.  Of course, we all thought it would be a great picture sitting on the edge of the dangerous rock as waves crashed, so we grabbed our cameras and off we went.  My companion and I were taking a picture at the far end of the rock when I heard a loud commotion from the ramp onto the rock.  Apparently, someone had been stung by a bee.  It was funny at first seeing a few elders jump around complaining about a sting or two.  Then, as we watched, a giant black cloud of thousands of bees appeared as Elders scattered in all directions. It was exactly like the movie Tommy Boy but real bees. They were covered in bees from head to toe. The cloud hadn’t reached me yet so I was directing the other Elders to lower themselves into the water to get the bees off of there bodies and at the same time be careful because of the waves.  I realized the cloud of attack was nearing and I covered my face and ran straight toward the one exit ramp off of the rock.  I was engulfed and stung hundreds of times along with the rest of them.  It turned out the hidden bees were Africanized bees that can be very dangerous.  The more and more you swipe at them, the angrier they become.  We found ourselves rinsing bees out of our ears, hair and everywhere else as we swam under water away from the attack to safety.  We spent the rest of the afternoon picking stingers off of our bodies and prepare to go back to our areas to work that night.  The work must go on and we had to be on the streets by about 4 pm.  As bad as it hurt to be stung it was pretty funny looking at how beat up we looked. Every sting swelled and blotched red.  My eye was swollen shut and my companion looked like he had a mango on his forehead.  We knew it was going to be a long night when the first door we knocked on the woman said, “what’s wrong with your face?”

Elder Butler

Nicaragua Mission

Stuck It!

One dark, dreary, rainy, cold night in Tacoma, Washington, my companion and I were knocking doors in a neighborhood located on a steep hill. Due to the location of this neighborhood every house had seven or eight stairs leading up to the porch. We knocked on a door with a particularly steep staircase leading to a particularly small porch. After knocking, I took two steps back from the door I discovered that I had taken more steps than porch, and I had stepped right off the side of the porch. I was beyond the point of recovery and everything turned to slow motion. As I was beginning my fall I heard the door start to open. After about 5 feet of descent I landed on my back on the steeply sloped yard. I immediately went into a graceful back roll that would have made an Olympic Gymnast proud. I came to rest on my hands and knees at the bottom of the yard covered in mud as my companion and the man at the door stared in disbelief. I gathered myself, tucked my shirt back into my now soaking wet pants, and proceeded to say the only thing that came to my mind, "STUCK IT!". At that point my companion started laughing hysterically and the homeowner politely wished us well and shut his door.

Matt Harris
Washington Tacoma Mission

The Lesson

My companion and I were riding on the front seat of an old Toyota van used for public transportation. These vans flooded the streets, ferociously fighting for passengers, driving like this was their last day on earth. As usual, some small talk was made with the driver as we tore through the streets. As we approached the onramp to the freeway, we were moving about 30 mph around the gradual turn before entering the freeway. As we watched the driver, he leaned out is open window with his arm extended, the other holding the wheel, like a scene from Dumb and Dumber. With a snap of his arm, we heard a loud slap. We looked back and saw a few teenagers standing on edge of the curb, one of them holding his face and reeling in pain. The driver sat back down calmly and kept accelerating  toward the freeway. No one else in the crowded van reacted at all. My companion and I stared in confusion at the driver. Under his breath, he said calmly, "That will teach them to stand so close to the road". Suddenly it all made sense. Apparently the best way to teach someone a lesson is with a 30mph open hand to the face.

Elder Jared Medley
Mozambique Maputo Mission
2002-2004

The Grand Finale

This one time on my mission I was heading to church with my companion on bicycles. The dirt road that leads up to the church house is a virtual BMX bike track with several perfectly arranged humps that could be sailed over with ease. Every time I went to church I would hit the humps and catch a few feet of air with minimal effort. Most Zimbabweans have never seen a bicycle in the air and thought it was pretty cool to see me do it. My last Sunday in that particular area came and we headed to church. This time I decided to give my beloved fans a grand finale by catching some major air over a bridge that covers free-flowing sewage. As I lifted gracefully of the top of the jump, my front tire caught the top of the bridge, bringing the bicycle to an abrupt stop. A quick physics lesson ensued. I sailed over the handle bars and slammed into the bank of the sewage canal. Luckily I did not fall into the sewage but I did come away with a few bruises. My ego was crushed and my fans thought it was the funniest thing they have ever seen. I'm guessing the locals decided to keep their bikes on the ground after that.

Elder Adam Law
Zimbabwe Harare Mission

Poco Mas, Por Favor

We had a new Elder and were on our way to a dinner appointment with a sister in the ward. The dinner menu... Menudo! If you aren't familiar with menudo, well... let me just say that you've got to experience it to appreciate it;-) We explained to the new Elder (who was struggling to learn Spanish) that it was very offensive to not eat what was placed before you, but if he didn't want any more after his first serving, all he had to do is say... "poco mas por favor." He practiced this phrase all the way to the dinner appointment and had it down pat by the time we got to the front door. As he struggled with the chewiness on his first serving of menudo (hint for first timers... you will wear out your jaws trying to chew the stuff... just swallow it whole;-) and finally emptied the bowl, the good sister came by with the soup and the ladle and asked... "Quiere mas?" The Elder had by this time mastered the phrase and said with an air of confidence... "poco mas, por favor." The sister just beamed as she filled up his bowl for a second serving. The new elder who thought he was going to die getting through the first bowl looked over at us flabergasted, at which point we reminded him that it was impolite not to eat the food that was placed before him. Maybe the sister didn't understand him, we suggested, and perhaps he had to enunciate his words a little better. So... he cowboyed up, finished his second bowl of menudo, and when the good sister came around again with the soup and ladel she asked the new Elder..."Te gusta?" This time he sat up straight, looked her directly in the eye and with a voice of conviction that Saint Peter himself could clearly understand... "POCO MAS, POR FAVOR!" The sister was thrilled! Finally (she said in rapid fire Spanish) there was an Elder that had arrived who appreciates her cooking and she was so glad that this Elder had come to her home. All this while she is ladling up his third bowl of menudo. Well, needless to say the rest of us were in stitches by this time and the new Elder just looked more perplexed. He somehow managed to finish his third round of menudo and finally figured out that perhaps "poco mas, por favor" didn't really mean what he thought it did.

Elder Guernsey

Texas San Antonio Mission

I thought you were a spider

It was fast and testimony meeting. The church was old. The pews were hard. The spirit was... well it was probably good, but I was asleep. I was sitting behind a gorgeous sister missionary, when those comfortable wood pews seemed to engulf me. I drifted off to the reassuring words of faithful saints. Waking on the oft occasion a testimony became so emotional that the voice of the bearer seemed to reach a pitch so high as to pierce the ears. As my mind wandered off a spider slowly meandered in, crawling ever so softly on my forehead. The spider then jumped back to the pew in front of me, only to return again. Over and over this spider danced his dance until I had awakened enough to feel it's gentle touch. The tickle sent me into an immediate unconscious reaction. I swatted my hand as if to end this spiders existence. Only it wasn't a spider... It was a stray hair from the sister missionary directly in front of me. The spider didn't feel my wrath, but that poor Sister's head did. I fiercely swatted those luxurious locks of lovely hair, and the head attached to them. Her reaction was to be expected, mine wasn't. Instead of immediately apologizing for the harm I had caused her, I made an excuse... "I thought you were a spider!" I exclaimed. I am sure you can imagine the confusion that ensued. I tried to explain myself, but the damage had been done. What can I say, except that if it was a spider... I'd have been doing her a favor. Maybe we'd even have an eternal family?

Elder William Johnson
Japan Tokyo Mission

The Yellow Raincoat

This one time on my mission...it was my very last transfer and I was given the assignment to train a new elder. We didn't have too much in common so, I knew that this could be the longest six weeks of my life. That's when I thought of the most wonderful idea, The Yellow Raincoat. In our mission it was a rule that the companion who wasn't driving the car would have to stand behind the car to help his companion back-up. One summer day in Florida (which is pretty much everyday) in the middle of June my companion and I went to a local grocery store. When we got back to the car with our groceries, I informed my newly uninformed companion that there was a new mission rule. The rule had just come down from the area presidency.  I told him that there had been several accidents recently where missionaries were getting hit by cars because people couldn't see them well enough. I pulled out of the trunk, a bright yellow rain coat and told my companion the importance of obeying all the rules. I still remember the look on my companion's face has he grudgingly put on the raincoat that was half his size.  He stood about 6 ft. 4 in. not mention it was 100 degrees with 99% humidity.  The last thing anyone would do is put on another layer of clothes. Nonetheless, my companion was obedient, he stood behind the car in the grocery store parking lot of Winn Dixie and backed me out of the parking stall like a pure champion. This continued for about two weeks when I finally told him that the area presidency had lifted the rule of wearing yellow raincoat's.
Chad Johansson
Florida Tampa Mission

   

Welcome to This One Time on My Mission

A mission is a very sacred and memorable event in our lives, an epic time held dear to our hearts. It is the true trial of human spirit. It is the time for boys to become men. The experiences and relationships cultivated will be cherished forever.
We appreciate your willingness to share your experiences with us in our endeavor to immortalize these experiences.
After coming home from our mission, we often find ourselves sitting around a table at a mission reunion holding our stomach, reeling with laughter (this is how much of our planning meetings are spent). These are the stories we want to collect.
We would like to create a collection of stories that will help people understand the humorous side of spending time in The Lord's service.

Please refer to the guidelines below to help decide what stories to share.

• Story should not implicate any missionaries engaging in criminal activities. Legal authorities will have access to these stories.
• Should not implicate missionaries in breaking any mission rules. Use the bending of rules at your own discretion.
• No stories that depict horrifying or life-threatening situations. We still want mothers to send their sons out.
• Please do not include confessions of current or past transgressions. Reserve these for testimony meeting.
• Please do not share paranormal or unnaturally miraculous situations. We know every missionary has seen one of the three Nephites.

Please include the following information in your story:
Name e.g. Elder/Sister ____
Mission where you served
Story- brief and to the point.